As an Online Dating Coach, I read a lot of Internet personal ads that - quite frankly - surprise me! Some of the guys who write Online Personal Ads seem to be writing ads that are designed to sell used cars. And from the women? I often see personal ads that even low-end mail order catalogs would refuse.

Take for example this one, written by a 41-year-old woman (and note the spelling error in the headline) --

professional who enjoys open conversation - 41

"I love to talk about books that have struck you bizarre or interesting. I do want someone to hang out with, and must enjoy talking about politics, books, places and wine. Must love chocolate!"

We can immediately see that this woman likes to communicate (and that's a good thing, yes?) and she also enjoys "talking about everything" - including "books that have struck you bizarre." (Are we talking about Stephen King novels here?) In addition to that, it would be great if you can talk about "politics, places, and wine" - but the main thing is that you love chocolate...

It's hard to imagine what sort of guy she'll attract with that ad!

Or - take a look at this online personal ad, from a 29-year-old guy who describes himself as a "Tattoo Teddy Bear" --

tattoo teddy bear - 29

"I just want a good girl that knows how to treat a man with respect."

Short, sweet, and to the point, yes?

So is it any wonder that so many single men and women are just like "two ships passing in the night?"

One of the secrets to writing online personal ads that work is to write your ad just like you're having a real, live, conversation with your reader.

In other words, here's what NOT to do:

1. Don't write your ad so it sounds like advertising copy from a magazine.

2. Don't "talk down" to your reader.

3. Don't write a one-sentence ad and expect to get many replies!

Here's what youSHOULD do:

1. Talk about yourself in terms of who you are as a person, what you enjoy doing on a date, and list some of your hobbies and interests.

2. Tell the reader (without bragging) how he or she will feel when they're with you. Put yourself in the mind and soul of your reader, and empathize with them. What are they thinking - and what might they be feeling - while reading your ad?

3. Talk about some of your best qualities. (Are you warm and friendly? A good listener? Are you compassionate and understanding?)

4. What's the benefit (i.e., the "payoff") for answering your ad right now? And finally...

5. Don't forget to spell-check your ad before you submit it!

By creating an honest and empathic dialog with your reader when writing your online personal ads, you'll be way ahead of most of your competitors for the attention of the women - or men - you'd like to hear from the most!